Dress Rehearsal

The older I get, the more and more I learn that the universe is all about balance. Without it, the world wouldn’t make sense. I’ve adapted this idea to my eating habits, and it has turned out quite well. If I’m craving fries, balance it out with a salad. You know, that kinda stuff. It works the same with other things, too. But the difference is I have control of the balance over my eating habits. I don’t really have control over the entire universe. Last week was one of those weeks where I needed to remind myself of that fact. But in the end, it became one huge week of extremes if I really think about it, so maybe its meant to be balanced out by normal, surrounding weeks. Who knows.

It began last Wednesday. I started the morning off as usual, waking up to my alarm, pressing snooze, wasting 15 minutes checking my Facebook, and frantically getting ready in 20 minutes. I decided to grab a protein shake for breakfast on the way. I should have known that open container of anything + Elise + Subway = spill. I had to stand for the first half of my subway ride, and as I was trying to get my headphones out of my bag, I forgot I had an opened protein shake in my hand and spilled half of its contents on the subway floor. I was smart enough to have brought a paper towel with me so I had something to wipe it up with, and some random guy gave me a sheet of his newspaper so I wouldn’t have to hold a sopping wet subway floor infested paper towel for the remainder of my commute, but nevertheless, it wasn’t the easiest thing to deal with first thing in the morning. (Don’t worry, I thoroughly washed my hands later.)

Then I got to work and things went as usual. In the middle of the day, my manager gave me a raise. I didn’t even have to ask for it. VICTORY! But of course, the universe had to balance this out, because literally right after I signed the paper for said raise, I picked up the phone to answer it and hit myself smack dab in the eye.

That night I also had picked up a delivery shift. This was the first night I’d be doing delivery all by myself. I had three training shifts, all of which happened in the first week or two of starting my job. Which happened a month and a half ago. Which means I hadn’t done this by myself ever, or in a long time. So there’s that. Long story short, literally any and everything that could have gone wrong, did. I was in the weeds for 2 and a half hours and I could not get out. I won’t delve into detail, but I decided that it was my dress rehearsal. You know how a bad dress rehearsal is good luck for a great opening night? Well, I told my manager that tonight was my dress rehearsal and that I would never make a mistake again because I already made every mistake possible and I don’t the same mistakes twice.

And I was right. The next four days (I worked overtime last week) I worked the delivery shift sans mistakes. I have a 99% success rate when it comes to mistakes. I’m dead serious. I don’t repeat them. Ever. If I make a do mistake it’s a completely new one I haven’t made before. Strugs don’t count as mistakes though (tripping, spilling, etc). So now I am proud to have conquered the delivery beast.

But the week was not over. Thursday night after work I went out with my coworkers. We stayed out pretty late, but I was determined not to break my cab streak. Since I have moved to New York City, I have yet to pay for a cab (this does not include the cab from the airport to my apartment). So that is approximately 2 months and 18 days cab free. I don’t know about you, but I think that’s pretty impressive (or cheap, depending on how you see things). So I schlepped my determined self over to the subway station at 3 in the morning to head back up to Harlem.

I’ll preface this for any worrying adults reading this (...Mom...) that lets take this as a lesson learned that I can laugh at because nothing really bad happened and now I’ll never make this mistake ever again (remember my mistakes ratio).

So I stepped on the subway and realized the error of my ways immediately when I stepped onto the train. Lets just say a lot of people looked like they were planning on spending the night on the train. I put my headphones in and prayed for the trip to go by fast.

And then I woke up. I get off at the 145th stop on the A train and I woke up at 175th. I didn’t even know that stop existed. In horror I ran off the train, realized what happened, and waited for fifteen pain stricken minutes for the train going back downtown. I ended up getting home at 4.

Then that weekend I got stricken by the allergy bug and it looked like I was crying for two days straight. Damn you, spring!

So here is what I learned last week:

  1. Don’t bring an open protien shake on the train.
  2. Sometimes making a mistake is good because then you know what not to do.
  3. Don’t take the train home at three in the morning. Paying for the cab will be worth it.
  4. Take your allergy medicine consistently.
  5. 47 hour work weeks are hard, but nice for your paycheck!

There you have it folks. I guess I had to have a crazy week to balance out some boring week I’ve had or will have in the future. Live and learn.