Awkward Sweat

If you’ve read my last couple blogs, I know what you’re thinking: Where is e-strugs, and what have you done with her? She is into EXERCISING!?  

Never fear, Strugfans. Strugs never die. I woke up Saturday morning with a random case of twitch eye. WebMD told me I was drinking too much caffeine and I could get rid of it by blinking really hard. 

Twitching aside, due to my newfound fitness enthusiasm, new strugs have also ensued. Every time I go to Soul-Cycle, I have to simultaneously remember the number of my bike and my locker at the same time, and my brain doesn’t hold numbers well. I accidentally tipped 40% at the nail salon the other day.

One of the biggest issues I’ve come across lately is the awkwardness of sweat. There is a percentage of people in the world who don’t sweat, and I hate them so much for it. My roommate is one of those people. It’s so rude. When I exercise, I sweat a lot and my face turns beet red. Some people barely glisten and can go on with their day, while I’m wringing perspiration out of my hair during and after spin class. 

The awkward thing about sweat is that you can’t control where it happens or how much. You can’t control it at all. And when you leave Pilates class in light grey sweatpants only to find there is an obvious sweat crease between your uh...groin...you have to think fast and cover up quick. The other day I went to class feelin’ all hot and toned so I didn’t wear a shirt and just wore my white sports bra and yoga pants, only to find 45 minutes later a clear obvious line of boob sweat the was perfectly visible.

A couple weeks ago, I was taking a shower after Soul-Cycle class, which is stressful in and of itself because there is a whole routine involved, remembering to put your sweaty clothes in a bag, setting up the stuff you brought to shower, etc. Anyway, I was in the shower, completely undressed, when I realized I’d forgotten a towel. It’s either now, or having to figure this out later, I told myself. And because I’m socially awkward and too frightened to stick my head out of the shower and try to ask a stranger for a towel, I decided there was no other option but to put my sweaty clothes back on, run out and go get a towel. 

I took my soaking wet cotton Victoria’s Secret PINK leggings back out of the plastic bag, and pulled them over my ankles, one by one, sans underwear, of course. Let me tell you, despite the obvious grossness of having to put sweaty clothes back on, it is also extremely difficult. Putting on skinny jeans may be a difficult task, but putting on sweaty cotton leggings trumps it by a mile. I will never forget my towel again. I will also only purchase black workout clothes from now on.